Moving Forward

Krya's comments & her thought provoking blog RIGHT HERE RIGHT NOW has got me to thinking again....oh no, anything but that.... Life has given me many choices...it may not have seem like it at the time but they were there....from the very beginning...and only I could make them...whether they were right or wrong...I have to live with them and hopefully learn from them. I think back on some of my choices and see that they may not have seem the wisest or best choice at that time but they did set things in motion to make me the person that I am...

My first marriage lasted 5 years ...I chose to marry someone I knew had a drinking problem (history of alcoholism in a dysfunctional family) but I was so desperate for someone to love me that I overlooked all of that...I can see now that I was young (18 yrs old seemed so old then)...but the choice was mine ..the best thing that came out of that marriage is The Kid..and my memories of Jason, my son who died at 7 yrs old....and for that reason I would never wish that I could have done differant...
Even with Jason there was choice to be made...the doctors & my husband all tried to talk me into putting him in an institution when we knew that he was brain damaged and that he had a short life expectancy...and it would have been an easy choice but I chose instead to keep him with me for as long as I could...which was til the day he died in my arms at home...because of the choice I made I will always have those memories to cherish..
Even with The Kid there were choices to be made...when I found out I was pregnant with her I was in an abusive relationship due mostly to my husband inablity to accept Jason. When I told him I was pregnant he gave me a Choice...I could get an abortion but if I chose to keep the baby our marriage was over..it was anyway because he had found someone new...He did offer that I could stay with him and the new love until the baby was born (big of him wasn't it) Well....I chose My own way...I moved out at 3 months pregnant with Jason and gave birth to the most beautiful Healthy baby girl in the world...A choice I have never regretted....
I always felt like I was moving forward...I knew that life was going to be hard with a special needs (i like that so much better than brain damaged) child and an infant but I also knew that life with my husband at that time would be one of abuse and misery....I Know I made the right choice that time...

My life with Larry was filled with lots choices...from the time I met him to the day he died....I knew when I met him that living with a paraplegic would be hard at times...but again I knew that I had lived through hard times before and that I could do it...I felt like being with him I could Move Forward...And I did...With him I learned that someone could love me for who I am..and that feeling still makes me want to be all I can...and I have 23 years of memories to keep me going...

All these choice make me who I am today.... Some say I am a strong woman....I say I am just a Woman who has had to live with her choices (just like we all do) some good and some bad...but always Moving Forward.

Will I always make the right choice? Who knows! I've made my share of mistakes in this life that's for sure...But as long as I stay true to myself I think I will be able to make the choices that are right for me at the time...I have to have faith that my past experiences will help me in making those choices..The main thing is that I keep Moving Forward in this life...

20 years later

Wheatridge Colorado..March 1986....Larry was told that his job with the Government was being eliminated and that he had a choice between Houston TX and Atlanta GA to be transferred to...or he could always look for another job in a differant field...He had been with the Government since 1980...not that long but long enough that he didn't want to start all over again...besides it wasn't that easy finding a good job if you were in a wheelchair...So we talked it over and decided that we would move to Atlanta...I put my notice in at my job with the county Health Department..and started to clean out the house and all the junk that we had accumulated in the 6 years we had been together..by June we were ready...The Kid (and Critter, her cat) was going to Wyoming to spend the summer with her Granny. This would give us time to find a place to live and to decide if Georgia was really where we wanted to be...

I think back now and we were sooo young and not smart about this move at all...We didn't have any idea of what we were getting into...We didn't have the internet to check out the location...We knew no one from the area...had no idea where we would live...no idea if I could find a job..II would definetly do things differant now).all we knew was that Larry had a Job...so we packed up and drove our cars from Colorado to Georgia in June 1986...such confidence we had that all would turn out all right....that's 20 years ago and Lordy so much has happened to me since then...
I sometimes wonder if I could go back would I make a differant decision...would I have chose to stay in Colorado...closer to my family..but then I think..if we hadn't made that move...then #1 Niece wouldn't have moved here in 1993 and she wouldn't have met Jack and had The Boy and Mini Meme...and The Kid...she wouldn't have Bubba and Lil Missy...

Back in 1986 I weighed around 180-190 pounds...I knew that I was slowly getting fatter but used the excuse of the move to eat more...and to give up walking..(I used to walk everyday from my work to Larry's work at lunch in Colorado, about a mile). I had been overweight since my first marriage back in 1968 but always said I was "large boned" and since I was solid I could carry more weight...what a joke... I'm not sure when I tipped the scale at 200 plus...it just happened...next thing I know the scale is saying 265...so I threw the thing out the door...In 1992 I did lose 100 pounds by going to a nutritionist and exercising (walking & riding my bike)...I kept if off for a year...then I fell and hurt my knee...this gave me a reason not to exercise and then I figured since I had lost all that weight I could go off The Diet..and go back to eating the way Larry & I liked...I didn't take up ALL the bad habits but the one thing I did was started eating Large Porportions again....and one of Lar's and my favorite thing was to go to Dairy Queen for a blizzard...in fact we had a joke about how we would drive up to the window and wouldn't even have to order because they already knew what we wanted..They knew Larry's car...I never fried foods...but we did love our sweets...and 6 months later I was back up over 200 pounds..but I was happy or least I was convinced I was...

Up to the last 6 months of his life Larry was a Big guy...he probably topped the scale at 290 pounds (if we could have found one that weighed him and his wheelchair) and he was 6'4"...because he didn't have any control over his stomach muscles..he had a big belly too...in fact everything about him was big...I miss that!!! But I now realize (I think I knew back then too but just didnt' want to admit it) that I used his size and his attitude about Big Women (he loved them) to stay fat. So where does that leave me now 20 years later and without that crutch to fall back on?

I tell myself that I won't EVER go back to being overweight..that if I ever stop exercising and watching what I eat that it can happen way too easy...so I am ever vigilant....and that's my plan for the next 20 years!!!!

I wonder why it is that everything I start to write ends up with me thinking about this weight thing...I start out reminicing about moving here and end up thinking about how I got to where I am in my weight....hmmmmmm I must be totally obsessed!!!!

I've been lurking

A whole week has gone by and I haven't blogged...mostly been lurking...lots of interesting things going on out there...
Not much happening here...really really busy at work...
Will try to update soon
meanwhile check out this site from Kyra's blog yesterday....it is toooooo funny...
http://www.brawnyacademy.com/brawnyacademy.html

rantings of a crazy woman!!!!

Don't get me wrong...I like guys with a lil meat on them...I'm not attacted to skinny guys at all...I don't know if this comes from being overweight myself for sooo many years..but I seem to remember even when I was a young skinny thing it was always the heavier guys that I liked...I DO like to LOOK at those muscular guys at the gym, you know those guys with the ripped muscles and tight asses...but I wouldn't want to take one home...ok maybe for just a lil while just to try it out...LOL...So when I made the comment about Stew being more overweight than "stocky" I didn't mean that this was a bad thing....altho I have noticed that I am getting less attracted to the "sloppy" fat guys...but if a guy is overweight and at least tries to be neat about his appearance then I just figure there's more to snuggle with... but again I have noticed that in the last couple of years my attitude has changed...I really want a guy that takes care of himself....someone who is fit enough to keep up with me....maybe a few pounds over but not to the excess...and I know that the "ole beer gut" is to be expected in any guy over the age of 50?...right???? I see skinny guys with the beer gut all of the time....which is really an ugly sight if you ask me...skinny guys with beer guts..yech...
Now there is this one older guy at the gym that I think has the perfect body....he works out all of the time and is pretty fit but not so overly muscular...he's a nice guy but he's looking for the young buffed blonde bombshell...we've talked...and he's really nice...oh wellll....
Enuff of thinking of guys today..on to something more puzzling to me...

Why is it when you come into work late and work through lunch that the day seems longer altho it's the same hours of work????
I went to the dentist this morning for the first time in about 2 years. I've got a lot of work that needs to be done but have been putting it off for ever because I didn't like the dentist that I was going to...in fact I have NEVER liked Dentists...I hate having someone in my face...and having to keep my mouth open for any period of time is a killer for me...so now I sit here with a mess of teeth that need work...LOTS of work...i just wish my insurance would cover it ALL..Monies is one of the excuses I've used not to get them fixed but I've decided to COMMIT myself and get them taken care of once and for all, instead of taking a vacation this year I am using that monies toward getting my teeth fixed...It just doesn't make sense to get my body in shape and then have terrible teeth..altho if you look at the majority of people in Georgia they all have bad teeth...I myself have had bad teeth since I was a child...I did get some extensive work done on them in my early 30's and was pretty good about keeping up with them until Larry got sick...now it's like I have to start all over....I wish I would win the Lottery so I could get Veneers on all of the ones I have left..
I remember being in my 20's and using my bad teeth as an excuse for being overweight...I always said if I could only get my teeth fixed I know I would lose weight....didn't happen...so now I'm saying since I've lost the weight now is the time to have good teeth....Bad teeth run in my family...except for my older sis who was the only one that got braces when we were young so she had the toothbrush and HAD to brush her teeth...the rest of us didn't...My younger sis has had false teeth for some time now and they definately didn't help her looks...I really fear having all my teeth pulled and having to wear dentals....I mean I can't stand even chewing gum...or having anything in my mouth without gagging (no wonder I don't get dates...LOL)...
Which reminds me....I found out Saturday I can't chew gum...The Kid gave me some Obits gum (I was concerned that I might have bad breath for my date) and i kept biting my tongue while trying to chew...How do people stand having that in their mouth...I never chewed gum even as a kid...I did try it once but found that I was a "smacker" drove me bats....

Yay, the racquetball courts are open again...they redid the floors...I was having withdrawal...I did think I would get more workouts in since I couldn't play but that just didn't happen...in fact I think the past week I've gotten worse about working out than I ever have been...Not quite sure what's going on..probably too focused on guys (got to get over that)...but even my run on Saturday wasn't good..I just can't seem to get my mind into it...I ended up walking more than I have in a long time..and then when #1 Niece backed out on running on Sunday (just because it was Father's Day and she wanted to fix breakfast in bed for her hubby...what's with that?) instead of going by myself which I usually do...I took the day off and didn't run at all...Now if I wasn't doing this 10k on the 4th that won't be a big deal..but I know that i need to be training more for this race or it will end up like the last 10K I did.... It just seems that the more I push the more EE & MM take over and tell me I can't do it...and I'm listening....I really need to get in the right Mind Set for this....

Date Night!

I met Stew on Saturday night at 7 pm at the mall... He's a nice guy but no sparks, but then I really didn't expect there to be.
altho I had seen a picture of him..it wasn't a very good picture..taken from far away and he did tell me that he was "stocky"...so when I first saw him I realized He was shorter than I thought he would be...we were about the same height (since I wore my heels) and he looked older than 46..and I guess his definintion of "stocky" is differant than mine...I figure @ 270 pounds he was more overweight than stocky...but that part really didn't bother me...I'm used to "big" guys...he wore very thick glasses and had very thin lips...but looks aside he IS a very nice guy and I did have a nice time with him...atho I was home by myself by 10:30 pm...
We went to the Movie..The X-Men...it was a great movie..can't wait for the next one to come out...The thing I really like about Stew is his laugh...he has one of these loud belly laughs that just makes me smile...The first time he let loose with one I thought..."Wow...that's sooo coool". I felt relaxed around him...
After the movie we went to this lil Greek resturant in the Mall and had Ravolli..and he told me all about how he can't exercise because of all of his illnesses...He's diabetic, is on heart medicine, has bad knees and I can't remember all the rest...And he kept telling me how beautiful I am ...I was alright with it the first time but it got to where I was uncomfortable with his compliments after awhile....I mean I Did look good, my new hair cut is to die for but believe I'm no ravin beauty..
All in all it was a nice time and I would probably go out to see another movie with him if he asked but there is one thing that bothers me....
I parked at the end of the parking lot...and he parked in the desk close to the mall...when we said good bye at the end of the night he didn't even offer to walk me to my car...now I probably won't have accepted his offer but I think if he's as much of a southern gentleman that he claims to be shouldn't have at least offered?
It did leave a bad taste in my mouth...

Well anyway so much for MY FIRST REAL DATE since becoming a Widow...

I have a DATE!!!!

Altho I cancelled my account with Match.com I still am on line with a couple of online dating sites that's free...lately it seems that I have been getting lots of differant hits from them....to say the least it's been interersting....

1. Pierce...54 yrs old ...lives in NC..is looking for someone to ride with on his Harley Davidson....He's been retired for 5 years...after talking with him on the phone .... I found out the reason he's retired so young is due to a neck injury...and he has a very bad memory...the second time we talked he couldn't remember talking to me the first time...He will come to Atlanta to meet me (if he can remember)...NO THANK YOU...

2. Walt....32 yrs old..lives in Sandy Springs GA.. is really into older women...cute picture...nice hunky type guy...thought I looked hot in my picture and wants to be my "Boy Toy"....hmmm Evil Eva wants to think about this one for awhile....

3. Chuck...36 yrs old...is in Missouri but comes to Atlanta often...is a personal trainer and wants to do an experiment with tickling....Evil Eva is checking this one out....

4. Dr. Lou...55 years old ....lives in GA...is a nurse and wants to meet and have dinner....Moanin' Mona thought he sounded good but I'm not sure on this one yet as we haven't spoke on the phone yet...I mean what kind of guy calls himself Dr. Lou?

5. Michael...51 yr old...lives in Dacula not too far from where i live..he looks good in his picture and his profile...but he hasn't responded back to my response to his email...we'll wait and see what happens with him...

6. Mike...52 years old...lives in Conyers..works at Wild Bills (a club i've been to)..ok to mail but he's too good looking for me (kind of reminds me of Cary Grant)...Ok call me chicken but I've found that guys who work in clubs are just too much of players for me...

7. Steward (Stew)...46 years old..lives in Decatur (on the other side of Atlanta). He's an insurance adjuster..works out of his home..is recently divorced (Janurary) and likes to kiss...We spoke on the phone last night and set up a date for Saturday night to go see X-Men...we are both into Sci-fi movies...I've been wanting to see this movie but really didn't want to go by myself...so when he asked ...I thought...Why not...

Oh yeah...least we forget...there was the 19 year old college student who says older women are the best..I didn't even respond to him...whats up with these kids????

Now have you noticed a trend here....NONE of these guys are my age or older...but I've decided not to let that stop me from dating them...after all who knows I might have some fun..

Discipine in eating heathy! Who'd thunk?

I absolutely love it when I read something that sets me off to thinking…Skwigg’s "The Gym Whisperer" did that for me today…she talked about Discipline and I think the part that really hit me was:
“It takes discipline to go to the gym every day. It takes discipline to eat right. People must feel like they have to do those things because they're being punished for something - for being overweight, or having bad genes, or turning forty. Working out and eating right is something they've been sentenced to for not measuring up. That's why they hate it, avoid it, deny it, and weasel out of it.”
This is out of context and you really need to read the whole article to understand just what she is talking about but this is the one part got me REALLY to thinking…that if I use discipline for making myself go to the gym...and believe me this is not punishment for me but something I like and have made it a part of my life…then why can’t I do the same and use discipline to help me in eating right…although I tend to think it’s more training than anything…
I think I did a pretty good job of bringing up The Kid and whenever I’ve had a dog it has always been well trained…so if I take this knowledge I got from those experiences and apply it to my eating it might just work…

I figure you need tools to discipline/train at least I did when bringing up The Kid…let’s see how this can relate to eating right.
1.KNOWLEDGE :I read a lot about how to be a good parent….OK…I’ve collected a lot of cook books and I go on line to find recipes for eating healthy…also I read everything I can get my hands on about how others have learned how to eat healthy...such as most of the blogs on my list.
2.RESTRAINTS: In training a dog to stay by you when walking you use a leash and not let them run wild…OK…so when I go to the grocery store I take a list of foods that I know are good for me and only buy them (this could be considered a leash)..
3.REWARDS: I used rewards for when The Kid & #1 Niece did the right things…such as going to the park to play after behaving when at places other than home…OK…my reward for eating healthy is I feel better about myself and I get to buy new clothes that actually look good on me..
4.PLAN: In training a puppy not to chew…first you put things out of reach that you really don’t want them to chew…So, if I do happen to wimp out and buy something that I know is not on my list (for instance I love trail mix with choc chips in it) then when I get it home I divide it up into serving sizes (this keeps me from doing the mindless eating thing..you know when you open the bag and just keep eating until it’s all gone) then you put it somewhere that isn’t readily available and only eat it on plan as a treat.…
5.ACTION: If the puppy does happen to start chewing on something you don’t want them to have, you take it away from them…saying no, no…and give them something they can have (like a chew toy)….OK so say I have already had my one serving of trail mix and am going for the second…I can always say no and go for the grapes that I have ready…yeah…that might work for me…I love grapes too..

Anyhooo…you see how this works …I could probably go on forever but for now I think this might just work…Not sure if this is really what Skwigg had in mind when she wrote her article but this is where it took me….

Breaks over

A month ago on May 11th I decided that I wanted to take some time to enjoy and appreciate this new body I have altho I still have 20 pounds to lose...At that time I felt that I was not only feeling good but looking good....during this past month I haven't changed any of my habits, I watched what I ate and exercised just as i've been doing for the past 2 years. I just quit worrying about losing that 20 pounds and relaxed...and altho I haven't gained any weight in this month, I also haven't lost any...I purposely didn't weigh myself during this time...because the number on the scale is not ME...I really do believe that I needed this Break BUT.....
This past weekend Not only did I feel fat but When I looked in the mirror after my shower, for the first time in a long time I saw the fat around my middle and on my upper legs....sure it's not as much as there was 2 years ago..but it's still there and I DON'T LIKE IT....I know that I can be better...I can look better and feel better...SOOOOO....the BREAK IS OVER and I'm BACK with a Plan....
after looking at WHAT I need to change to start losing weight again using all that I have learned in the past couple of years about myself....I sat down and had a talk with Me, Myself & I and decided that I would really concentrate on getting to 161 pounds by July 4th when I run the P'tree Road Race...
I weighed in at 169.5 this morning so that is 8.5 pounds in 3 weeks= or 2.84 pounds a week...I know this is a little much to try to lose in this amount of time (1-2 pounds a week is recommended)but I think I'm ready and can do it. I really need to do this and get myself off of this plataeu, which I think is mostly a mind thing anyway, or an excuse not to work myself that much harder...anyhooooo....I DO know what is keeping me from losing...
1. My night time eating 2. I have become pretty complacent about pushing myself at the gym...sure I go and I work out but I haven't really pushed myself to my limit in a long time....soooo for the next THREE weeks this is my Plan...

Food.....The secret is not to let myself not get sooo hungry that by the time I get home I'm ready to eat anything and everything in the house so During the week I will eat my larger meal at work and eat VERY light when I get home from the gym..And to do this I need to plan & pack my meals ahead of time.
SO...After cleaning out my fridge to make room for lots of veggies & fruit, then going shopping for the healthy foods that I really do enjoy but have been to lazy to cook, I spent a couple of hours yesterday and cooked a spagetti squash, a butternut squash, my favorite Cabbage/Spinach/Tofu casserole, grilled some salmon & boiled eggs (for salads)...then I packed all with some other good stuff I already had, such as veggie burgers and turkey ham, into 10 differant tupperware dishes and put it all into the freezer (except for the eggs)...Now all I have to do in the morning is grab a dinner out of the freezer (4 differant meals to satisfy whatever craving I have that day) and put it in my bag (this will last me for 2 weeks of workdays), that way I can have my larger meal here at work in the middle of the day and then when I get home from the gym I can fix a quick salad (luv those bagged salads), chop some fresh veggies or fruit for it and enjoy..and if I really want to keep eating I will just say NO and take myself to bed...how coool is that? I'll let ya'll know how this works out....
I got all week to figure a plan on how to get through the weekend and
I will be thinking about what meals I want to pack ahead of the time for that last week....
today's meals....
6:30 am Protein drink with Supplements/vitamins
10 am Kashi hot cereal with ripe banana..I've basically given up the cereal now that it's warmer but had this banana that is a little riper than I like so decided to go ahead with the cereal today...
1 pm...1 cup of Cabbage/Spinach/Tofu Casserole and a plum
4 pm ...apple & string cheese
5:30 ...1 oz almonds
8:30 spinach salad with strawberries/blueberries/walnut pieces/blue cheese crumbles & raspberry vingrette...Yummmy...I can hardly wait...I usually have this for lunch but finding that I get too hungry to soon..doesn't last me till supper....


Exercise....NO racquetball this week since they are redoing the court floors so this will be a good week to start upping my intensity of workouts..I usually go pretty light on the nights I play racquetball because I don't want to get too tired that I can't play...well I won't have that excuse this week so I plan on getting at least 3 days of running on the treadmill for 30-45 mins (usually only do 1 day during the week and then figure I can run on Sunday at the park)...after running at the park yesterday I realize I really need to up my running...oh yeah, I did run the 3 miles around the lake without walking at all, but ended up taking a quick break before doing the 2nd 3 miles and just couldn't seem to push myself to run the whole way..gave into Moanin' Mona & Evil Eva way more than I should have...
Plan
tonight stretch/run on the treadmill and do LBWO/ABS
Tues...stretch/45 mins on eliptical and do UBWO....mostly tris & bis, some chest
Weds...stretch/run on treadmill again and do Back/ABS
Thurs....stretch/Abs/some LBWO and Hip Hop
Fri...Stretch/Bike/and then I'm going to try out the Yoga Class... a friend of #1 Niece's is the instructor and he has been trying to talk me into at least trying it but have always said no because that's when I play racquetball..so I figured this was a good time...Wish me luck since I am not flexible at all...can barely touch my toes even with all the stretching I do and I HATE floor exercises...It ought to be interesting...

I'm going with Kyra's Mantra "If I get it right today, I will be better off tomorrow"
Funny how she always seems to know just what motivation I need and just when I need it...that's one of the main reasons I read and blog...I truly don't believe a person can keep motivated without some type of help & support, besides why should we try to do it all by ourselves, it sure makes it sooo much easier...Thanks Kyra....

ROAD TRIPS...HERE I COME!!

Last week on the hike Wayne told me that he had been to every state in the US and So when I found this link on Rob's blog that lets me map out all of the states that I have been to, I was pretty pleased with myself...I'm more traveled than I thought...I figure I have 16 states I haven't been too (can you name these states without looking at an atlas?). This gives me another goal in life, to see as many of these state I haven't been too..I've always wanted to go see the Cherry trees bloom in DC (I know I've missed it for this year but there is always next year) and it really isn't that far from GA...just a straight up drive on I95... and have dreamed about going to Maine & Alaska. My friend Con is going to Alaska this next week, I tried to talk him in slipping me into his bag but I don't think his wife would appreciate that since she isn't going...dang, but I'm thinking next year when he goes I'm going to talk her into going and then I can go too...In fact there isn't a state that I don't want to visit...now to find the monies so I can take some road trips (if only I was born rich instead of beautiful..LOL). Any one want to go with me????



create your own visited states map
or check out these Google Hacks.

There's one born every day

and I am one...Sucker, that is...

I was bored one day last week and instead of coming here and blogging I checked my emails and there was one that said I could win $500 if I took this survey..yeah, I know...I usually ignore these things and let my span folder take care of it but this time I decided to go ahead and do the survey....the thing took FOREVER and it of course tried to sell me on all kinds of things I don't need... I thought I said NO to everything except for the book club zooba.com (which really doesn't seem to be a bad deal)....ANYHOOOO....I am now getting loads of emails from all these places wanting me to either do their survey or sign up with them...I'm having to take the time to unscribribe to each one...this morning the number was down to a mere 25...do you have any idea how time consuming this is...and after reading a couple of these "ads" I see in the small print that if I don't unscribribe then that means that I accept whatever they are trying to get me to do...whoa....
For some reason my spam feature doesn't work when I dial into AOL here at work...if I check them at home they are all in the spam folder but not here at work, which is where I usually check my emails because my dial up at home is soooo damn slow...(whoa that sounds like an advertizement on tv)...You'd think I would know better....

Sarah...where are you?

Diet Girl...hasn't posted on her blog since last Thursday..it feels like longer AND I also noticed that her comments on her blog has disappeared...AND I'M worried about her...Sure I know that she may have just gotten busy or maybe is having computer problems...but DAMN I want to know that she is alright...Sarah...let me know what's up with you..ok?

It's funny how personal you feel toward people and their blogs...it's one of the first things I check when I come into work...I get here early just for that...it's like my day doesn't really start until I check on everyone....I know, I know I really need a life...AM I the only one that does this? Could this become a addiction, if it already hasn't? This is a way for me to know that I'm not alone in this world of struggling to become healthy & fit...

I know that I don't blog everyday especially on the weekends and in my mind I think that no one will miss me if I don't blog..I know that #1 Niecegoes through this period when she thinks that no one reads her blog except her family...and when Kyra quit her blog for awhile I really missed her...and I know that Suzann & Joy are going through rough periods in their lives (having become widows like me) and they are both sooo supportive of me..and when I need to do some deep thinking I love checking into see what outrageous thing Liz on Granny Vibe has to say or when I need a good laugh or just to relax & get a guys veiw on things I check in with Geniune & Slimbolala...this is so much better than tv ever could be because these are all real people going through real things...and I love it..and find myself worried when they don't blog like Sarah or Cliff...come on guys there is people out there that care about you...let us know that you are all right...

What I learned this past weekend!!!

I had a GREAT weekend but I definately learned a few things....

1. When sharing one umbrella in a rain storm with winds a part of you will still get wet...
Yep, you guessed it... the Jazz Festival got rained on...Being the nice person that I am I shared my umbrella with Lamont...we tried snuggling together but the rain kept dripping off the ends and getting our legs wet and then the winds came up and we decided to forget it and go to a club...

2. I don't like wet soggy sandals!!! so on my way to the club, I decided to stop off and buy a new pair at WallyWorld...now for some reason my freinds found this to be "strange behavior"...I would have bought a whole new outfit since my capri's were soaked too but I only allowed myself 15 mins in the store...went right to the shoes...found a pair of wedgie sandals that I absolutely love and walked thru the womens clothing on the way to the check out but did not see anything that struck me as something I really wanted ...so I thought I did good to get the new shoes...I was in & out in my allotted 15 mins...I do not see anything "strange" about this behavior...it seem perfectly normal to me!!!

3. I love Valet Parking... especially when it raining hard and you have new shoes on...

4. Some Men will hug anyone that asks to be hugged.... OK so I'm waiting for my truck to be brought to me at the end of the night and there was this group of people hugging good bye and there was this one guy who was REALLY cute...so I asked him where my hug was...he just smiled big and held his arm open....He was a great hugger...I might just have to go back to that club...see I'm really am trying to become more open to new freinds...(ya don't think I might be overdoing it do ya?)

5. A hike is still a workout even if you are a "Social Hiker"... We ended up hiking for 7 hrs on Saturday and most of it was going up hill...I was just glad that I decided to be with the Social hikers. It was a GREAT hike and believe it or not most everyone was around my age, a couple even older...It gives me hope that I can be fit at 60 (just a few years down the road)and still live this active of a life...Good people...The view was so beautiful when we got to the top of the mountain..I could definately see why they are called the Blue Ridge Mountains...I am soo glad I went.

6. When you have 3 women and one guy spending 13 hrs together you really get to know each other... I car pooled with my Friend Cathy from the gym (a school teacher)(who's vehicle we ended up taking), Evonne (an OR nurse)and Wayne (a photographer)...all single and between 46-50 years. Talk about learning a few things about being single...especially from Wayne who has never been married and has traveled around the world...nice guy...Cathy really liked him but she isn't his type (none of us were, he likes them young in their late 30's) and he was really nice about how he told her that...He wasn't my type and I told him right off so we had a blast together just goofing off and relaxing around each other....it really takes the pressure off you once you know that you don't have to play any games and you can just be yourself...

7. Sometimes it's a good thing to be a vegetarian the four of us went out to eat at the Dillard House in Dillard GA after the hike..it was an experience for me since they bring out all this food (country style) and you serve it yourself..there is no ordering... every table gets the same thing...They start out by bringing this little plate of sliced catalope, melons & tomatoes..I could have eaten the whole thing by myself but it was to serve 4. then they start to bring out the Meat....Lots of meats on BiG Platters...Fried Chicken, baked chicken, Ham, Prime Rib...then they bring out these little bowls of veggies, carrots, asparagus, corn on the cob, green beans in some kind of grease, an acorn squash souffle (which was good) and fried ocra (sp?)(which I don't eat) all this for $21 per person..Oh yeah, I'll get to the dessert later..anyhooo...once everyone realized that I don't do meat they were all trying to give me their veggies...when someone mentioned it was an all you can eat...so everyone started sending the servers back for more veggies...and when they did bring it, they brought it in bigger bowls.The dessert was a little bowl of blueberry cobbler with ice cream... since I don't do ice cream I asked them to bring mine without...it was such a lil bowl I think there was probably a total of 5 blueberries in the whole thing...good thing I filled up on the veggies...Oh yeah, Wayne got me a discount on the price since I didn't eat any of the meat...I only had to pay $16 to eat veggies...How funny...but I have to say the atmosphere of the place was really cool...I love being in the mountains...They had a banjo picker outside and we sat for awhile listening to him...It was fun..

8. I'm not ready to DATE...After listening to the three of them talking about all their struggles with dating I have come realize that I was right in the fact that I'm Not ready for any serious dating at this time...I'm just having fun meeting new people..

MY QUEST

to be more active and meet new people is looking good. I signed up for another hike for tommorow. This one is called Hike for the Hearty and it's at the Georgia/North Carolina borders...it will be a 10 mile hike and is rated moderate to strenuous. Again they have 2 differant groups...the "Social Hikers" and the "Fast Hikers"...this time I'm going to hike with the Social Hikers...I figure it will give me more time to actually meet and get to know the group and I won't have to worry about slowing anyone down on the inclines...Also I'm going to ride with the car pool this time since it is quite aways to go...figure again...more time to visit and get to know more people...this will probably turn out to be more of a "Social" event for me than exercise but what the hey...life can't be all about exercise, can it?

There is a group called SOA..Singles Outdoor Adventures...that I am going to check out..from what I hear they are a mixed (age) group and lots of fun...they do more than just hike...sounds right up my alley..

Tonight I'm going to another Jazz Festival..this one is close to where I work and is only from 7-9 pm. Since it's at a really nice park I'm going straight from work and meeting up with some freinds early..I've got my lawn chair in the back of the truck and if I must say so for myself...I look extra good today...I'm wearing my size 10 jean capris with the embroidered white roses on the left hip and on the right thigh, a really cute lite purple t'shirt with a low square neck and a lil bow at my shoulder, red hoop earrings to match my red sandals, a silver butterfly necklace and to top it all off I bought another new hat..this one is the same shape as the one I wore this past weekend but is straw colored with darker colored flowers on the side brim...it is so freakin' cute...add my really neat new sunglasses and I'm ready to go!!

Pretty soon I will have to get a social calendar so I can keep all these things straight...LOL..

I figured I've worked hard the past 3 years to get my Body in shape and this summer it's time to branch out and work on my social skills...