to have such a GREAT Daughter!!!!
Sunday The Kid and family came over and brought me a new microwave, a fan and a gift certificate to WalMart...They also brought over a window air conditioning unit which I asked them to return...it was all too much for me...I would rather they use that money on something else for them selves...I'll survive until I can get my air conditioning fixed... but I have to tell you that having a microwave is a Godsend...I never realized how much I truly use the mircowave...I hated using the stove...it heats up the house too much and I have to dirty so many dishes.....who'd thunk...
Tuesday, July 31, 2007
Sunday, July 29, 2007
struggling here to keep it Positive
Note to self ...this is not a pity party..this is an exercise to remind MYSELF how lucky I am...
Life hasn't been exactly what I want lately..it seems like since Larry died I've been slowly spiralling downhill and I'm having trouble stopping and getting my life back on an even keel.
Not that I haven't tried....just that nothing I try seems to be working...so this morning I've been having a conversation with Eva & Mona who seem to be ruling my life lately..I have to remind myself that I am stronger than both of them and that I've been through rough periods of my life before and came out of it (I just wish it wasn't such a struggle) and I will do it again (and again and again for as long as I live)..
So what brought this on...lots of little things (just this week.. my microwave breaking down on me...my purse strap breaking and not having any monies to buy a new one, not going out with my freinds last night because AGAIN I don't have any extra monies and not being able to afford the healthy foods that I've been eating in the last 3 years), big things (Larry's Mom passed away and her funeral in ND was last Monday. My Mom underwent surgery in Colorado on Thurs and I wasn't able to be there for either one of them...this hurts me more than words can say because both of them were here for me when I needed them...) and then yesterday I came home to find that my air conditioning isn't working...
Mostly it's all about MONEY...I don't have ANY and don't see myself getting enough to live the life that I've gotten used to while Larry was with me (he spoiled me so much)...I find myself being envious of all my friends & family who don't seem to have to worry about if they have enough monies to pay their bills and they can do pretty much what they want...
But then I remind myself just how lucky I am...
I have a beautiful home that I love with a house payment cheaper than what I could rent for (even with repairs)...There are people out there living on the streets or in housing that I can't even imagine living in..And I think about the Katrina refugees who lost everything and had to start over..so how can I sit here and complain because I don't have air conditioning..heck I never had air conditioning until I moved here to Georgia anyway...I do have ceiling fans in three of my main rooms...so I've decided to try to wait until I do have monies (I don't want to put anything else on my credit cards...hey there's something else I have a credit card that I can use for emergencies)..besides it'll save me some monies on my electric bill and maybe I'll actually sweat off a couple of these extra pounds I've gained in the last nine months...as for the microwave..I've also decided that I'm not buying another one...I just bought this one (at WalMart) a couple of months ago (using my credit card) and until I can afford the one I really want I'm going to actually use my stove and oven for cooking..it does take more time but what the hey...again I went many years without one so why have I become so dependent on it...time i have..money I don't!!!!!!
I may not be eating the foods I want...but at least I do have food to eat...again there are people out there that don't know where their next meal is coming from...I've been here before with eating cheap (I remember a time with my first husband where all we had to eat was beans for about a month) and I know how to do it...I just keep reminding myself that it's not forever...
So I didn't go out last night .Big deal..it's not the end of the world..and there will be other times when I can...I am so lucky to have rooms full of books and I stayed home and read..there are so many things I can do that don't cost monies...like go to the park...talk to freind on the phone...
I have to appreciate the things I do have...so I couldn't afford a new purse...at least I found an old one in the closet that I can use until I can..it may not be in style and I don't really like it but it does serve the purpose and it won't hurt me to use it....
And the most important thing is I have a beautiful daughter who has given me Two of the greatest grand kids in the world..We talk every day and altho I think sometimes I really aggravate her I know that she loves me. I have #1 Niece and I know that she is there if I need her..all I have to do is call her and she is there for me....There are people out who have no one...I have more friends in my life now than I can remember ever having...they are good friends and I'm the only one who thinks that I'm not good enough for them just because they have more monies than I do...proof of that is that one night while we were all gathered around Moanin' Mona was crying about how bad my yard was and they came over and helped me with it...It makes me realize that it's not the material things in life that really counts but what you do with what you do have in life..being negative is so easy but it really doesn't make things better...just makes it worse...and as I have to remind MYSELF everyday..there is always someone out there that has it worse than ME...
Hanging in there!!!!
Life hasn't been exactly what I want lately..it seems like since Larry died I've been slowly spiralling downhill and I'm having trouble stopping and getting my life back on an even keel.
Not that I haven't tried....just that nothing I try seems to be working...so this morning I've been having a conversation with Eva & Mona who seem to be ruling my life lately..I have to remind myself that I am stronger than both of them and that I've been through rough periods of my life before and came out of it (I just wish it wasn't such a struggle) and I will do it again (and again and again for as long as I live)..
So what brought this on...lots of little things (just this week.. my microwave breaking down on me...my purse strap breaking and not having any monies to buy a new one, not going out with my freinds last night because AGAIN I don't have any extra monies and not being able to afford the healthy foods that I've been eating in the last 3 years), big things (Larry's Mom passed away and her funeral in ND was last Monday. My Mom underwent surgery in Colorado on Thurs and I wasn't able to be there for either one of them...this hurts me more than words can say because both of them were here for me when I needed them...) and then yesterday I came home to find that my air conditioning isn't working...
Mostly it's all about MONEY...I don't have ANY and don't see myself getting enough to live the life that I've gotten used to while Larry was with me (he spoiled me so much)...I find myself being envious of all my friends & family who don't seem to have to worry about if they have enough monies to pay their bills and they can do pretty much what they want...
But then I remind myself just how lucky I am...
I have a beautiful home that I love with a house payment cheaper than what I could rent for (even with repairs)...There are people out there living on the streets or in housing that I can't even imagine living in..And I think about the Katrina refugees who lost everything and had to start over..so how can I sit here and complain because I don't have air conditioning..heck I never had air conditioning until I moved here to Georgia anyway...I do have ceiling fans in three of my main rooms...so I've decided to try to wait until I do have monies (I don't want to put anything else on my credit cards...hey there's something else I have a credit card that I can use for emergencies)..besides it'll save me some monies on my electric bill and maybe I'll actually sweat off a couple of these extra pounds I've gained in the last nine months...as for the microwave..I've also decided that I'm not buying another one...I just bought this one (at WalMart) a couple of months ago (using my credit card) and until I can afford the one I really want I'm going to actually use my stove and oven for cooking..it does take more time but what the hey...again I went many years without one so why have I become so dependent on it...time i have..money I don't!!!!!!
I may not be eating the foods I want...but at least I do have food to eat...again there are people out there that don't know where their next meal is coming from...I've been here before with eating cheap (I remember a time with my first husband where all we had to eat was beans for about a month) and I know how to do it...I just keep reminding myself that it's not forever...
So I didn't go out last night .Big deal..it's not the end of the world..and there will be other times when I can...I am so lucky to have rooms full of books and I stayed home and read..there are so many things I can do that don't cost monies...like go to the park...talk to freind on the phone...
I have to appreciate the things I do have...so I couldn't afford a new purse...at least I found an old one in the closet that I can use until I can..it may not be in style and I don't really like it but it does serve the purpose and it won't hurt me to use it....
And the most important thing is I have a beautiful daughter who has given me Two of the greatest grand kids in the world..We talk every day and altho I think sometimes I really aggravate her I know that she loves me. I have #1 Niece and I know that she is there if I need her..all I have to do is call her and she is there for me....There are people out who have no one...I have more friends in my life now than I can remember ever having...they are good friends and I'm the only one who thinks that I'm not good enough for them just because they have more monies than I do...proof of that is that one night while we were all gathered around Moanin' Mona was crying about how bad my yard was and they came over and helped me with it...It makes me realize that it's not the material things in life that really counts but what you do with what you do have in life..being negative is so easy but it really doesn't make things better...just makes it worse...and as I have to remind MYSELF everyday..there is always someone out there that has it worse than ME...
Hanging in there!!!!
Wednesday, July 18, 2007
What's wrong with this picture?
My romote for the tv in the living room doesn't work so I ran all the way into my bedroom to get that one to see if that one would work....it does...is this the saddest thing you've heard today or what?
BTW.. you can turn my tv on without the romote but there isn't any way to change the channels without the remote...when did the manufactures do away with that on TV's? Can you tell I don't watch a lot of tv....LOL
Oh yeah, I do have an old tv...#1 niece & hubby got it for me after Larry passed away..it's just a regular tv..no flat screen or big screen for me...and that's all right....since I would really rather read a book unless Miami Ink is on....whoooo hooooo....
BTW.. you can turn my tv on without the romote but there isn't any way to change the channels without the remote...when did the manufactures do away with that on TV's? Can you tell I don't watch a lot of tv....LOL
Oh yeah, I do have an old tv...#1 niece & hubby got it for me after Larry passed away..it's just a regular tv..no flat screen or big screen for me...and that's all right....since I would really rather read a book unless Miami Ink is on....whoooo hooooo....
It's ALL about ME!
So I did it...I am now a Bus Manager (that's driver to most but manager sounds better). I finished up at the gym after the Grand Opening in which I had only 7 sells...This was suppose to be the BIG day for Sales but it really was a bust...and I'm not the only one that didn't have the sales that was promised...so any way that was the deciding factor for me... I decided to get out of sales and to live life again..I'm finally getting back to working out and even getting to play racquetball again... haven't made any plans for backpacking. I'll probably wait for it to cool off some here first...
don't worry...I'm keeping busy...
I didn't start training until yesterday..so I had a week off to do some catch up and do somethings just for ME!!!!
The first part of the week I painted my bathroom off the master bedroom...I haven't painted this room for about 15 years and it really needed it...I painted it a "white Peach" with the ceiling & the trim "Peachtree"...hey, I'm in Georgia after all....LOL...It looks so much better...I plan on carrying the colors over into my bedroom. the "white peach" color is in my bedspread..that's where I got the idea in the first place...It took me two whole days to paint this tiny lil room so I'm waiting until I have more time to paint the bedroom...it's a whole lot bigger and I'm doing it all by myself...
On Weds my friend Joelle called and wanted me to check out a new club with her and the gang...talk about NiCE!!! Enjoyed it so much we all went back on Friday...
Thurs Joelle and I went on a quest in the Georgia Wine country....Joelle is into wines and she has never been able to find a good wine made in Georgia and had heard about a couple of winery's here in the North part of the state...We went to four and at the last one we found just what she was looking for..it was the best...It's called Wolf Country Winery....we got to sit on the outside patio..sipping wine, eating cheese & crackers and watching a fantastic sunset over the mountains..talk about relaxing....
Saturday I went to the gym & worked out (I actually went to the gym everyday but Thurs and worked out...it was great...but boy am I out of shape...it's funny how fast that can happen) and then went over to The Kids and picked up Lil Bit so she could spend the night with me...It seems like the last 6 months I just haven't gotten to spend much time with my grandkids...We had a great time together...went to the park and played..for a four year old she is soooo smart and beautiful....it was nice having someone tell me ALL the Time that she loves me....I got a lot of hugs and kisses all day....Nothing like a child to make you feel loved...sigh...
Sunday I actually got my lawn mowed (after working out at the gym)...I have been neglecting my yard so much this summer...but it looks pretty good right now thanks to the rain we been having lately...
It seems like I lost Myself for a while but I'm starting to feel like the old Me again...must be the clothes I'm wearing again....altho with the extra 20 pounds I gained my clothes don't look as good as they did last year on me....that roll of fat around my middle is driving me crazy..but hey...at least I know how to get rid of it...and I AM working on that...
SO "it's all GOOD" here with ME.....
don't worry...I'm keeping busy...
I didn't start training until yesterday..so I had a week off to do some catch up and do somethings just for ME!!!!
The first part of the week I painted my bathroom off the master bedroom...I haven't painted this room for about 15 years and it really needed it...I painted it a "white Peach" with the ceiling & the trim "Peachtree"...hey, I'm in Georgia after all....LOL...It looks so much better...I plan on carrying the colors over into my bedroom. the "white peach" color is in my bedspread..that's where I got the idea in the first place...It took me two whole days to paint this tiny lil room so I'm waiting until I have more time to paint the bedroom...it's a whole lot bigger and I'm doing it all by myself...
On Weds my friend Joelle called and wanted me to check out a new club with her and the gang...talk about NiCE!!! Enjoyed it so much we all went back on Friday...
Thurs Joelle and I went on a quest in the Georgia Wine country....Joelle is into wines and she has never been able to find a good wine made in Georgia and had heard about a couple of winery's here in the North part of the state...We went to four and at the last one we found just what she was looking for..it was the best...It's called Wolf Country Winery....we got to sit on the outside patio..sipping wine, eating cheese & crackers and watching a fantastic sunset over the mountains..talk about relaxing....
Saturday I went to the gym & worked out (I actually went to the gym everyday but Thurs and worked out...it was great...but boy am I out of shape...it's funny how fast that can happen) and then went over to The Kids and picked up Lil Bit so she could spend the night with me...It seems like the last 6 months I just haven't gotten to spend much time with my grandkids...We had a great time together...went to the park and played..for a four year old she is soooo smart and beautiful....it was nice having someone tell me ALL the Time that she loves me....I got a lot of hugs and kisses all day....Nothing like a child to make you feel loved...sigh...
Sunday I actually got my lawn mowed (after working out at the gym)...I have been neglecting my yard so much this summer...but it looks pretty good right now thanks to the rain we been having lately...
It seems like I lost Myself for a while but I'm starting to feel like the old Me again...must be the clothes I'm wearing again....altho with the extra 20 pounds I gained my clothes don't look as good as they did last year on me....that roll of fat around my middle is driving me crazy..but hey...at least I know how to get rid of it...and I AM working on that...
SO "it's all GOOD" here with ME.....
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