Yay, It's Saturday

I don't have anything planned for today except to clean up the house a little which is a never ending job. My question is how can a place get so messy when there's only me here??? I swear everywhere I look I see used Kleenex's and it seems like I'm always picking them up and putting them in the trash..at least my dishes are in the dishwasher and ready to run when it gets full (which takes about a week)...I can't wait to feel better and to get my breathing under control again so I can paint my guest bathroom..I cleaned it this morning and I really hate how dirty the walls seem..it's been over 15 years since I've painted in there and it really needs it..I wish I could afford to upgrade the sink and lighting..I do have my dreams (although I've decided putting a bookcase where the bathtub is won't work..lol)..but need to just hold onto them and wait till I catch up on some bills ......
I'm done with my Saturday morning calls for the American Kidney Services..I swear This week's call list was 4 pages of #s of Old Old Old People and believe it or not I loved talking to them..One lady had just lost her oldest daughter to cancer this past week and was apologizing to me because she wasn't up to getting anything together at this time to donate..Then there was the older gentleman who just lost his wife the day before..he too apologized that he didn't have anything this time but said to call him back the next time we were in his area...he was so nice.
I have so far (I still have 3 more days to call back the one's I couldn't reach) 40 definite yes for donations and 20 maybes (which is funny because it's like these old people don't want to say No and hurt my feelings, last week I had a total of 4 maybe's) I will call ALL of them back the Tues before just to confirm and hopefully some of the maybes will turn into Yes's (although it would surprise me)...My first week of calls I had 42 Confirmed pickups scheduled and the drivers actually picked up 38 which is an 88% pickup rate...and that's what I get paid on is how many of the confirmed pick up actually get picked up..I figured that at this rate I'm being paid $6 an hour. I guess that's not too bad for part time work done at home and my own leisure..but I'm sure not going to get rich this way...I'm still playing the lottery...it's my only hope of really getting rich since I have no rich relatives waiting to die...at least the monies from this job will help out. Even if it's only a little, I'm still ahead of where I would be if I don't do anything..I can tell you this..it's a lot less stress than driving a School Bus...Whew!!
I've been thinking about cancelling my membership with the gym. It's $40 a month that I could put toward my other bills and truthfully I haven't been using it enough to justify keeping it..I know I keep saying I'll get back into it but I've mainly been keeping it so I can play racquetball which I love and there isn't anywhere else I can play but I've only been averaging 1 day a week..that's $10 each time I play..that's pretty expensive for 1 hour ...I can work out at home and also get back into running at the park (which I really loved) for cardio so I don't really need. I'm also trying to start up a fitness group with Thus Fit...not sure how to juggle all I want to do with the time I've got..still looking at my options.
Just Mainly trying to get my life back to Normal (what ever that is), health wise at least..
It seems like , with my health , it's like being pregnant.... in the morning I have so much trouble breathing and am all congested and then after 1 pm I'm feeling better, not so much trouble breathing and only have to blow my nose every once in awhile..I just want to get back to feeling good again...I've been real careful with my diet...no processed sugar. But for last night when I got the biggest urge for pizza..so I got a DiGiorno Spinach Mushroom frozen pizza and had 2 slices (wrapped the rest for later in the week). I should have stuck to only one but it tasted sooooo goood...it did make me a little sick last night..my stomach cramped up and I got some heartburn..but it didn't make me cough...I figure it was the tomato sauce on the pizza but I could not find a frozen pizza at the store that didn't have a tomato sauce...I used to buy Amy's Roasted Veggie pizza (which had tomato's but no sauce on it) but Wally World (where I do most of my food shopping) doesn't carry it...they do carry some of Amy's other dishes but not the pizza's..Now I'm afraid to try to eat any more of the pizza I have but I don't want to waste it...so it's a dilemma for me..for now it'll stay in the freezer so when I can't stand the urge any more I can microwave me 1 slice...
Oh yeah...let me tell you what I won't ever fix again...this morning I didn't have enough dried cranberries for my oatmeal so I added some frozen blueberries to my water...which changed the color to a pretty red and when I added the oatmeal to it...it still didn't look bad...but then I added my whipped egg white and all of a sudden the mixture turned a horrible PURPLE color...it reminded me of this horrible mixture that my older sister used to make that she called Goulash..
As for taste..after I added my honey and I closed my eyes while eating it..it actually didn't taste too bad...but I'm telling you it was Slimy & UGLY Looking.....so much for experimenting with what I do have..I love my oatmeal in the morning and have been trying to think of things I can add to it and get my fruit in for the day...dried apples work good if I add some cinnamon...and have been thinking bout trying the dried mixed fruit..but after this morning now I'm afraid...but never say die is my motto for today..
Need to go make some flash cards for my French lessons so I can be ready for tomorrow when the group meets at the French Bakery. Talk about temptation..but I all ready know that I can't eat anything there. Will just have some tea.
'A la prochaine Mon Amies

Life is about to take another turn!

I heard from the American Kidney Services and started working on the call list tonight..And I'm not sure I'm really ready for this...EE & MM are both having fits...

FACT ....I need monies to pay off my credit cards and driving bus just doesn't pay enough so I KNOW I need a part time job.

The customer service job from home seems like a good deal. The work is a no brainer. There is no sales involved, no traveling and no boss looking over my shoulder all the time....It's calling from home and it will take 3 nights of my free time and my Saturday morning . It's definitely something I can do. The thing is I've been crunching the #'s and I'm not sure that it's going to be worth my time (EE & MM talking)....It is Commission (and that's how I got in this mess with the credit cards in the first place, working at the gym on commission only) At the worst I figure I'll be earning about $5/hr . Supposedly the potential is there to make more (that's always the story with commission)....and after taxes who knows what I will end up. I really haven't checked into any other part time jobs so I don't know what the pay is out there for the kind of work that I would qualify for...I figure it's not much more. I do know if I don't do SOMETHING I won't make even that....unless I win the lottery...and so far I haven't had any luck on that one...
So I'm committed to do a least this call list which is 10 pages long (around 700#s) out of which I need at least 35 hits...Tonight I spent 45 mins calling around 30 # and got 3 hits..I figure 10 more hours and I might make it....I will come home tomorrow night and hit it hard then call on Sat morning...that should give me an idea how this job is going to go...

Oh yeah, I didn't go to the gym tonight (I listened to MM & EE) thinking I would go tomorrow night and get a good leg work out but now I know that's not going to happen...I came home to work on the seating chart for my Elementary School and then I got the call from my new supervisor and we had to spend time on the phone going over the ins & outs of the call list so I missed eating dinner until after I got done with the calls (after 9 pm) and I let myself get really hungry
and as always when I'm faced with changes I go to the kitchen and eat everything I can find...so there goes that out the window tonight...now I'm busy coughing and I know I'm not going to be able to sleep because of all the things going around in my head....Coming here seems to help a little though so who knows.....Thank God tomorrow is Friday...And I WILL get back on track with my eating...I have to My Health won't let me do anything else....

Being Positive

Anther blogg...boy am I on a roll....but I feel good this morning (altho I'm doing alot of coughing) and know that I have to get back on track with everything instead of letting Moaning Mona and Evil Eva run my life...I can sit around all day, watch tv and moan about how bad things are but that won't change anything And I need things to change TODAY not tommorow or when I feel better...I need it done NOW...

There are so many things in my life that I have let slip and from reading my last years blog I see it started then and I really haven't done anything about...oh sure I tried for a day or two but then I let MM & EE take control...so how am I going to keep that from happening this time? Truthfully I'm not sure ....but I feel that if I take babysteps and not try to do everything at one time ....not put all the pressure on me at one time that maybe I can actually get back my "Sexy" who I truly loved being...

All my life I've struggled with things...no monies, being fat, feeling insecure but I KNOW those were all my own doings...no one is to blame but ME...I'm the one that has to take charge..if I don't have monies then I need to get out there and find out what is available to me..and if one thing doesn't work then try another...Everything can't be handed to me...(altho I'm still going to play the lottery and hope I win)...but I'm also going to look at what else is available to me..

Monday at the pharmacy there was a newspaper on the bench and while I was waiting for my prescription I glanced at the wanted part time jobs looking for an easy way to make some extra monies (not sure just what I was looking for, just know I need more monies). There was one in there for the Kidney Foundation Services for a CSR to make calls for pick up of donations. Now this is one of the charities I truly feel is a worthy charity and have tried to support it in the past due to my son Jason's illness with renal failure many years ago....so I brought the ad home but it's been sitting on my desk since then...as usual MM & EE have been telling me that this isn't something I want to do...I mean I hate telemarketing, calling peoples at their homes and bothering them..and besides I like my evenings and on the weekends I want to do things .....but I kept thinking about it and this morning I realized that this could be an answer for me only if I actually do something about it. So I sent an (what I feel is an informed) email to the address stating my reasons why I need this job and requested they get back with me if the job is still available...It doesn't pay alot and being on commission it would be up to me to push myself..but in the position I am right now every little penny helps besides I feel this would be a way to make myself feel better about ME...
If I do get the job it won't end my money problems totally and I still need to look at other options (like finding a summer job) but a least it is a POSITIVE step in the right direction...and if I don't get the position then I will keep looking for something else...I know it's out there...

It amazes me that just knowing that there are things I CAN DO for making my life better (which "Sexy" has always known) I feel so much more POSITIVE and ready to face life again.

Now if I could just figure out how to make it LAST.....