I'm so bummed

but I refuse to get discouraged!

I've been looking over future events for my outdoor club and I'm either too out of shape (since I've gained all this weight back) or too poor....

I did go on an overnight back packing trip last month and that's when I realized this extra 20/25 pounds really slow me down...it's not fair to the other campers when I can't keep up...so I guess if I really want to do this (AND I DO) then I need to get off my fat ass and get busy losing this weight and getting back into shape...
I've given myself one month because that's when Bruce has scheduled the Panther Town backpacking trip (Oct 20th) and I really want to go on this one..it's will be the one year anniversary of my first backpacking trip which was Panther Town...
This should give me the incentive to really buckle down and get busy...NO MORE EXCUSES...I know I can do it...I've done it before....I want to fit in all that gear that I bought especially for hiking...right now I can't get anything buttoned up and even if I did then I can't move...and believe me when you are hiking you need to be able to breath and move easily...LOL...

There are 4 other events before that that I won't be able to go on that I really want too but I have to be realistic ....
1. Introductory to Rock Climbing....this is an indoor thing that costs $30 and you need to be in shape to pull yourself up....This is something I've been wanting to try for awhile but now that the chance is here..I can't do it and it's all my own fault...the only thing I can tell myself is...I will be ready the next time they offer it....and knowing these guys ...they will offer it again...and I'm going to be ready....
2. Caving trip to Cedar Ridge....I haven't done any caving yet..last year I was thinking about trying it...altho tight places aren't one of my favorite things...I'm told this is a fairly easy caving trip...it doesn't cost anything but you must be in shape....
3. Fall Creek Falls State Park...Cabin Camping and waterfall hike....cost $57....sounds like a great hike..but is rated as difficult...I did a couple of difficult hikes last winter but again don't feel that I could do this without holding up everyone...plus the monies ...which I don't have...again...maybe next year..
I'm hoping that I will be in better shape and that I will have the monies when Paula posts her ZipLine trip...we talked about it on my last hike with her and it's one of the things I really want to do....

So since I really love doing outdoor activities especially in the fall and winter I had better get a plan on how I'm going to get in shape to do all the things I want...

1. Start running again at the park on the weekends if not during the day when I'm not working...there are two parks that I go too that have off trails that I can put on a backpack and walk/run just to get myself ready...that is after I get myself built back up a bit.....
2. Stop SNACKING....if I'm not at home but out running or working out at the gym this should be easy for me to do....And start eating regular meals...it's been to easy to just fix myself something easy...usually something totally carb...need to get back to the basics like fish (grilled salmon, tilapai, or chicken) and some steamed veggies.....no more peanut butter and honey wraps...I think I've gotten addicted to peanut butter in the last few months...it doesn't matter that it's natural...it still has lots of Calories....
3. Get back to the gym at least 3 x a week...and work out with the free weights..I really love how I feel after doing this...my excuse has been that since I don't drive by the gym anymore on my way home that it's easier to go home than in the opposite direction....This IS JUST an EXCUSE...it only take me 10 - 15 mins from where I park the bus to get to either one of the gyms that I can use....
I've only been playing racquetball on Mondays but talked my partner into playing on Thurs too....since this is something I really enjoy ...it gets me into the gym and since we don't play until 7 pm it also gives me a hour to work out before playing....hmmmm sounds like a plan...

NOW DOES THIS ALL SOUND FAMILAR? .....HAVEN'T I SAID ALL THIS BEFORE? So what makes it differant this time?

I REALLY WANT TO BE IN SHAPE FOR THAT HIKE IN OCTOBER AND I KNOW I HAVE TO START NOW....NO MORE PUTTING IT OFF AND MAKING EXCUSES!!!!

I've said it before

Where does the time go? It's been almost a month since I've blogged...not sure if it's because I've been busy, didn't feel that I had anything to share or just got out of the habit of coming here..but I'm going to try to do better...for my own sake..

I finished my training for bus manager (4 weeks of Hell), got my CDL (commercial drivers license) and am now driving my own bus on my own routes...this is my second week of driving by myself and the first day that I really thought I might just make this....I didn't make any wrong turns, miss any stops and was only 10 mins late for my last route (this is a big improvement from last week)...so far the kids are great, especially the high school kids. Even my Middle school kids aren't as bad as I was told they would be...I have a couple of girls that are pushing to see how much I will put up with...are they ever in for a surprize....because so far I push back and am not taking any "shit" from them...I figure another week and all will be good there...I have 2 elementary school routes that are a little more of a challenge...mainly due to the number of students on each route..the first one I have 66 kids and the second one I have 54...this is a lot of kids..and I'm just getting to know them....will probably have some stories to tell before long....but I don't want this to become just about my job...but I might need to vent now and then....we'll see how things go...

Oh yeah..I leave to get to my bus at 5:30 am and get done with my AM routes around 9:30 then I have until 1:20 to do whatever I want...right now I'm coming back home to rest and check my emails...probably will blog at this time each day UNLESS I start going to the gym to work out...that was my BIG plan last week but so far that isn't happening...I am going to the gym tonight to play racquetball...yay!!! Like I said I have to be back at my bus by 1:20 so I can get in the line up for my High School...and then I get to do all my PM routes and finish around 5:30 pm...so it's a pretty full day...I was hoping I could find time to get a second job to help pay the bills but with going to the shop for repairs, getting fuel, and going to meetings...my time is pretty well taken up during the day....so I guess I'll just have to wait until this summer and see about getting a part time job to help catch up on all the bills I've accumulated this past year...

The Kid and her hubby came through for me AGAIN...and gave me an early Christmas Present (more like ALL of my presents for the future) and I am now the proud owner of a beautiful new air conditioning unit..it's much bigger and quieter than my old one...which was almost 20 years old and outdated to had to be completely replaced....the Son in Law just happened to be friends with someone in the Heating & Air business and got a "deal" on it...so they tell me..It is/was hard for me to accept it because I'm am so damn independent and hate asking for help from anyone...I think I should be able to handle everything that comes my way...but I will admit that I did need the help this time...I don't know what I would have done with out my family....there's no way I could afford to buy a new unit until next summer when I get a second job..

I'm having a GOOD day today even if I did get on the scale this past weekend and almost fell off when I saw what I weigh....talk about a "slap in the face" ....I really need to "WAKE UP" and get back on a program....NO more excuses...NO MORE SNACKING....back to regular "eating" times and I will get back to an exercise program....and coming here to blog will keep me "honest" NO MORE LISTENING TO EVIL EVA AND MOANIN' MONA....