Can't sleep!!!!

It's 3:30 am and I'm back to not being able to sleep again.... I hate this... It's been going on for about a week now. I figure it must be part of going through the change... I don't get night sweats but I seem to only be able to sleep a couple of hours then I wake up and have trouble going back to sleep unless I get up and do something for about an hour or so. I did go through this for a long time after Lar died but thought I was doing better... At least I was waking up would go to the potty and then crawl back into bed and go right back to sleep... but not lately..I seemed to be doing better once I gave up sugar.. Maybe I just have too much on my mind LOL. Oh well, doesn't seem to be anything that I can/will do about it... Not going to the doctor and I hate taking meds of any kind to make me sleep...so will just deal with it... The thing that keeps going through my mind is that I've read that if you don't get the right about of sleep it will affect how you lose weight... Damn, the more I think about that, the more I can't sleep... I've always got along on just a couple of hours sleep my whole life, maybe that was a big factor in why I was/am so fat....LOL
I took a night off from the gym last night... I just felt so bone tired and realized I haven't given myself a break in a weeks... I've really been pushing myself so I would get to 169 by this week... I don't know why I feel guilty if I miss a day of working out but I do. I know in my mind that I need to give myself a break but I keep thinking if I miss even one day it will be too easy to miss more and then I'll be right back where I was... Truthfully, I don't think that will happen as long as I'm having fun at the gym... I do love going... it's nice to know that I'm "popular" there...(who'd thunk) There is always someone there that I know and enjoy talking too... I don't have that anywhere else in my life right now and I guess it's important, at least to me...
I'm flying to Newark NJ today to meet up with some friends I've made through eDiets. We're going to do a 10K run tomorrow morning for the Katrina victims and then Sunday go for a nice hike... so I will make up for not going to the gym. I find that I really do like being adventurous and doing things I never have before... I have never been up that far north and I'm really looking forward to it... It should be fun. Although I will miss running with #1 Neice on Sunday... But there's always next week...
Well, I think I'll go finish cleaning up the kitchen then try to get a couple of hours more sleep... I started a new book by Nora Roberts, that I bought for the plane ride, last night instead of cleaning like I planned when I took off from the gym... oh well, I really did need the rest...