Before setting my Goals for 2006 I need to do some more thinking about what I did or didn't do in 2005...this time I want to look at the negative things..things that kept me from reaching my goal of 149 pounds... I basically can track it back to 2 things...
1. Not being honest with myself... I've always had a problem with this...I'm a "sneak" eater...in the back of my mind...way back there with all the garbage...I think that if no one sees me eating something then it doesn't count or matter.. I have no problem with eating the right way when there are people around...in the back of my mind (again?)I think I like being a martyr...."Sue only eats healthy, she won't eat like the rest of us"... But then there are those times when I listen to that Evil Eva side of me and give in and buy foods that I know I can't or WON'T control...oh I convince myself that I can, sometimes I even come up with a plan on HOW I will only eat a little of something at a time...it's like I sabbatoge myself. Take for instance Peanut Butter...I know that I love the Natural PB and I'll convince myself that I can buy a jar and keep it in the fridge and only have a little as a treat now and then...I mean after all it's Peanut Butter, no sugar and it's healthy...right??? Ok I get it home and before I put it in the fridge I need to stir it so all the oils will be mixed...and since I've got the jar open I might as well have a little, Right??? And instead of this jar lasting me a month it's gone in a week...because I keep going back and having just a little taste..ok...maybe more than a taste...how about a big spoonfull...now since this isn't a meal I don't have to count it in with the calories for the day...right???
I have the same problem with veggie chips & veggie Tortilla chips lately...I convince myself that once I get the bag home I will divide it up into serving size baggies and only have one every other day... I have accually done this a few times and it works out good...I count them in with my daily calorie count and only eat them with a meal... but then there has been those times when I didn't even get the bag home before I opened it and had a few handfuls and before I know it the bag is gone...usually this happens on the weekends when I am home by myself...
Now who am I fooling here? ...only myself... This is all about making the right choices and most of the time I do make the right choice, it's those few times that I don't that are killing me...and if I'm totally honest with myself here, then it's probably more than a few tims.. a few times won't have made much of a differance so obviously I'm blocking out alot of those times and pretending that I'm more perfect than I am here...Sooo what's the answer here?
2. Not Journaling I have no idea why I can't seem to get a handle on this. I know that when I honestly journal I stay on Plan...but then we go back to #1 and I conviently forget to put down that I had that spoonfull of pb or that handful of chips..or the weekend comes and I convince myself that I don't have time to write down what I eat when I eat it and then it's too late and since I've missed that day, why bother...I convince myself that I'm doing alright without journaling...I can't tell you how many times in the past year I have said I was going to conquer Journaling...only to give up on it after a few days...I have the little notebook that I bought the last time I promised myself that I was going to start...it's almost empty...I've tried several differant ways ..on the computer...but since I don't usually go on the computer at home...I miss the weekends and then it's the same ol' run a round...always an excuse....
Now the Big question is How IMPORTANT to ME is Journaling in 2006? ... Well let me take a look at the pro's and cons of Journaling...
PRO... 1. When I stay honest with it, it makes me accountable for what I eat. 2. Whenever I have stayed accountable for eating healthy I have lost actual pounds.
3. This gives me something to look back at and see what I am doing right or wrong.
4. I can't cheat and conviently forget that I ate something if I log it in....
CON I have to take the time to either write in my little book or go on the computer to log in what I eat...
2. I know this is a dumb one...but I hate my handwriting..it irrates me when I go back and look at what I've done to see such scribbling...(I do tell myself to get over this one...but I'm being honest here and this is something that bothers me).
3. I can't cheat and conviently forget that I ate something if I log it in...
OK I know it's important that I get in the habit of journalling and to be totally honest with myself... It is a big step in getting myself under control if I am truly serious about reaching my goal of 149 #'s or less this coming year...
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1 comment:
I think this is an EXCELENT post and a great excercise. you've made some great observations.
I totoally understand the 'not journaling' thing. It's what kills me too. When I count in my head what I'm eating I think I'm doing ok. When I right it down I KNOW if I am ok or not.
The only alternative I've found to journaling is to pre-plan all my food and then only eat what's on my plan - but that's not easy either.
I say this to a lot of people - but I say it because I BELIEVE it. if you can, pick up the book the "Thin Commanements" - it talks about MUCH of what you're talking about here - how to avoid the 'just one' syndrom and other things that hamper our progress.
Good luck in the new year!
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